Philosophy Theatre

Dr. William Right is reading in his study when Serhild barrages in.

She runs up to him and says, “Father! I want to go trick or treating! Can I go?”

Dr. Right sighs, “I don’t care much for Halloween myself, but if you really want to go you can. On one condition though. Your sister, Mechtild, will be going with you to keep you out of trouble.”

“Fine! Fine!” Serhild agrees.

Serhild runs off to find Mechtild. After a bit she finds her in the kitchen.

“Mechtild! Father has agreed to allow me to go trick or treating. I want to go!”

Mechtild turns around and smiles, “That’s wonderful Serhild! Let’s go to the store and get costumes so we can go and trick or treat.”

Serhild is excited, “Ooh yes! That sounds fun!”

They head out to the store to look at costumes. There is a wide variety avaible, and Serhild excitedly goes from on to another checking them out.

Serhild holds up a skimpy looking pirate costume, “What do you think?”

“Um, I don’t think that one is appropriate,” Mechtild replies looking at the costume uncertainly.

“Why!? It looks so much better than all the others! Why would you say such a thing?”

“I think it’s too low cut, you’ll show your belly button when you wear that one.”

“But that’s not important! Look at how cool it looks!” Serhild shouts, grabbing the costume with both hands. “Oh, please Mechtild, make up your mind! You’re the one who will be wearing it.”

“Me?! I’m not wearing that!” Mechtild says taken aback. “I think I’m going to dress up as a cop.”

“A cop!?” Serhild says, surprised. “Why? What’s wrong with dressing as a pirate?”

Mechtild smiles, “Because a cop protects people while a pirate steals from them.”

Serhild rolls her eyes, “Ok then, fine, go get dressed up as a cop.” Then she holds up the pirate outfit while pointing at herself, “I’m going to be a Pirate Princess!”

Mechtild laughs, “You are ridiculous Serhild. A Pirate Princess? Really? Alright, fine then.”

Serhild is happy again, “Yay! Thanks Mechtild! You’re the best!”

They go back to the house to put on their costumes. Serhild puts on her pirate outfit and Mechtild puts on her police uniform. They are both excited to go and go to tell Dr. Right they are ready to go out.

“Serhild!” Dr. Right exclaims. “Isn’t that outfit a little too revealing?”

Serhild is confused, “W-what? This is my pirate outfit. Why wouldn’t it be ok?”

Dr. Right shrugs, “Well, I’m sure you’re the prettiest pirate we’ve seen. But isn’t there a dress code for pirates, somewhere?”

Serhild thinks for a moment, “Hmmm, I don’t think so.”

Mechtild with a smug look on her face says, “I told you it wasn’t appropriate.”

Serhild pouts, “But Mechtild, pirates are a big deal in stories and games, they should be allowed to wear what they want.”

Sighing Dr. Right says, “Well, I guess it could be worse, and it’s too late to pickup another costume. But pick something more modest next time.”

Serhild sighs, “Fine, alright.”

Then they leave. The two android girls walk down the sidewalk looking for a house to knock on for candy.

Mechtild turns to Serhild, “I wonder what sort of candy we will get?”

Serhild giggles. “Oh I hope there is some good candy in this neighborhood. I like to eat lots of candy! But not chocolate, because chocolate is for losers.”

“But I like chocolate,” Mechtild says with a puzzled look on her face.

“I don’t care, you can have it, I’m getting something better than chocolate.”

They come to a house with it’s porch light on and knock on the door. A tall, thin man answers. He has long hair and a big mustache that hangs over his upper lip. “Happy Halloween!” he shouts cheerfully. “I’m so glad you came to my house, girls!”

He takes out a small box, “Here, take these. They’re a couple of my favorites.”

“Aw, thanks!” Serhild says as she takes the candy from the man’s hands.

“My name is Bob,” the stranger says with a smile.

They thank him and then leave to find another house. After getting candy from a couple more houses, the two are walking down the sidewalk when they notice a large crowd gathered in front of some strange building.

“What’s all this about?” Mechtild asks.

“I don’t know, let’s check it out,” Serhild replies.

They approach the crowd to see what is going on. Standing in front of them are a group of men in pirate costumes gathering candy from people.

“Alright everyone, hand over your candy tributes to the great Candy Pirate Queen, Jaelle. That is unless you want her to play a trick on you!” One of the men shout.

Serhild laughs, “That is such an awful joke!”

“I know!” Mechtild chimes in, and they both laugh together.

The man with long hair and a big mustache steps forward and speaks to them. “You two ladies look sweet. Hand over your candy and I’ll show you how to really have fun tonight.”

Serhild grins, “No thanks, I think I’ll just keep mine.”

The pirate steps closer to her and cracks his knuckles, “Oh, you’d better had over that candy if you know what’s good for you.”

Serhild looks at him with wide eyes, “Are you threatening me, pirate?” She asks angrily.

The pirate smirks and nods to himself, “Yeah! I am threatening you. I’m going to steal your candy and you’re not going to be able to stop me. And, I’m gonna do it right now!”

Serhild punches the man in the face knocking him cold on the ground, “You idiot! That’s what you get for defying the Pirate Princess!”

She turns back to Mechtild with a smile, “That’s why I love Halloween. So much excitement!”

“This isn’t fun, Serhild. This is serious! They’re really stealing candy from people!” Mechtild replies.

Stunned one of the other candy pirates yells, “What the hell?! Did that girl just knock him out?”

Another pirate approaches them from the side and grabs Serhild from behind, “We got you girls now, you won’t get away from us.”

Serhild breaks free of his grip then grabs him and slams him on the ground knocking him out as well.

One of the other pirates draws out his sword, “These aren’t just for show. You girls are in for it now!”

Mechtild pulls out a handgun she got from her father for protection, “Drop your weapon!”

The pirate drops his sword and raises his hands in surrender, “Please don’t shoot! I give up! I’m done.”

The voice of a young girl comes from the direction of the building, “Why so noisy? Need candy to nom now!”

Walking towards them is a strange grey skinned girl dressed in a pirate queen costume that looks like she is ten years old. Her hair and eyes are purple, her mouth is full of sharp teeth, and there are two horns on her head.

The pirates all fall silent at the sight of her and their attention shifts to her.

Mechtild studies her, “That’s quite the costume little girl. Are you the so called Pirate Queen, Jaelle?”

The girl giggles and runs towards them, “Yup! Me the Queen of the Pirates! Now give all your candy!”

Mechtild says, “We’re not giving you anything. Stealing candy is wrong. You have to stop this and go home.”

Jaelle puts her hand out and summons a orb of darkness from somewhere and hurls it at Mechtild. She tries to shield herself, but the force of the dark magic sends her flying backwards into a nearby tree.

Jaelle has a smug look on her face, “Bad people who not give treat get tricked.”

Serhild stares at Mechtild slumped next to the tree then turns back to Jaelle, “What? How did you do that?”

Jaelle shrugs, “Always know how. Now give candy.”

“I have a better idea. How about me the Pirate Princess and you the Pirate Queen team up. We could get tons of candy!” Serhild offers.

Jaelle smiles, “Okay! Me like! I be Queen and you my Princess.”

With that they go off in search of candy to steal.

Mechtild begins to stir and get back on her feet dusting herself off, “Ugh, what was that? That was no ordinary little girl. If a human was hit by that they could be seriously hurt.”

She looks around for Serhild or the pirates but sees no one. Concerned Mechtild heads out to search the area. While she is searching, Serhild and Jaelle are going around stealing candy from trick or treaters.

Snatching some candy from a little girl Serhild comments, “Nice costume. I bet you got a lot of candy for it.”

One of the pirates comments, “Heh, nothing easier than taking candy from babies.”

Jaelle says, “Yes! Take candy from baby! Not even have teeth.”

The other pirates laugh as the little girl cries.

Suddenly Mechtild appears behind them, “You naughty pirates! I told you to stop and go home. Now you’re gonna pay for your evil deeds.”

Jaelle waves her hand towards Mechtild, “Princess, beat her up.”

“But she’s my sister!” Serhild protests.

Jaelle stomps her foot on the ground, “Should obey Queen! But fine, let you keep all candy not chocolate. What say?

Serhild reluctantly agrees, “Fine, but you better not tell.”

“What are you doing, Serhild?!” Mechtild says shocked. “Are you siding with these candy pirates?”

“Yeah, that’s right, I’m siding with candy!” Serhild replies happily.

“I can’t believe you’d turn on your sister over a few pieces of candy!” Mechtild says sadly.

“But there was no other way to keep my candy! It was either you or them! I had to decide, and I chose them,” Serhild says. “They’re the lesser of two evils!”

Serhild draws out a pirate sword and swings it at Mechtild. Using a piece of metal she’s carrying as a police baton Mechtild blocks the swing. They exchange blows for a while parrying each other’s attacks. The fight starts moving them in the direction of Jaelle.

Jaelle laughs and claps, “Fun, fun! Good show!”

Serhild brings down a powerful overhead swing that Mechtild blocks and struggles against. She leans forward and whispers in Mechtild’s ear, “I’ve got an idea. Let’s work together.”

Mechtild nods and lets Serhild take the lead. Serhild lunges at Jaelle swinging her fist as the other pirates watch on in suprise. Jaelle is caught completely off guard by the blow and staggers to the side. Then Mechtild rushes in from the other side and strikes her in the back of the head with the baton.

Jaelle falls to the ground, “Ugh… You… How could you?!”

Serhild high fives Mechtild then, “That’s right! We did it! Now we can take all the candy for ourselves!”

“No, Serhild, we have to return all this candy to people it was stolen from,” Mechtild replies shaking her head.

“But why would we give all this candy away?” Serhild asks.

Mechtild sighs, “Because it’s the right thing to do. How would you feel if someone stole your candy?”

Serhild pauses for a moment then, “Well, I wouldn’t be too happy about it.”

“Exactly,” Mechtild says smiling, “and we need to return it. Not only will we be good, but everyone else will be grateful too.”

Suddenly, Jaelle starts crying and yells, “Big sister! Come help! Girls being mean to me!”

Down from the sky riding on a guitar axe comes a pink skinned demon girl wearing a black and purple witch costume.

She steps in front of Jaelle, “What did you two do to my little sister?! I’ll beat the crap out of you!”

“Did… Did she just fly down from the sky on a guitar? Who are these girls? Are they demons for real?” Mechtild says shocked.

The demon witch grins, “That’s right I’m, Scathach, a mighty demon witch.” She starts playing a rift on her guitar causing the axe blade to heat up and flames to come off it, “Now, get ready to get for my Red Hot Rift!”

Jaelle raises her fist into the air, “Yeah! Get em big sis!”

Scathach swings her axe guitar at Mechtild who blocks it with her baton, but then the metal starts to melt and give way. The axe slices through it heading for Mechtild’s shoulder. However, before it hits it begins to slow down for some reason giving Mechtild time to jump away. The strike hits the ground instead igniting the surrounding grass on fire.

Scathach looks puzzled, “Huh? That’s weird. Felt almost like something was pushing back on my axe.”

Serhild rushes over to Mechtild, “Hey, are you okay big sister? Are you hurt?”

“It’s okay I’m fine.” Mechtild replies.

With an annoyed look on her face Scathach says, “This next one won’t miss. I’m going to fry you bullies!”

She begins to gather flames into her hand forming a fireball. In response Mechtild pulls out her gun and points it at the demon witch.

Scathach stares for a moment sweating then yells, “Aw crap! She’s packing heat! Let’s get out of her, Jaelle!”

She picks up Jaelle and runs away.

Jaelle crosses her arms, “Big sis big coward.”

“Hey, I’m not bullet proof.” Scathach says looking down at her.

As the two run away Mechtild holsters her gun and sighs, “Glad that’s over with. Now to return all the candy to it’s rightful owners and go home.”

Mechtild rounds up the candy pirates and turns them in to the police while Serhild gives back all the candy that was stolen. The kids thank them profusely for helping to get their sweets back. Then they head back to home to Dr. Right.

He’s waiting for them in the living room, “You two are back a bit late? I hope Serhild didn’t get into any trouble.”

Mechtild laughs nervously, “Just a little bit of trouble with some candy thiefs, but we took care of it.”

“I see. Well, as long as you’re safe, that’s all that matters.”

Serhild says, “That’s true daddy. Now let’s go relax and watch that movie we rented together.”

The three watch a Halloween movie together while Serhild and Mechtild munch on their candy.

Off in a secluded mansion in the woods, Scathach and Jaelle are standing before a masked man in a black and purple suit. A matching cloak with a jester hood is draped over him.

“Me hungry! Want candy!” Jaelle yells crying.

“I thought Jaelle was going out to get candy? What happened?” The man asks Scathach.

Scathach sighs rolling her eyes, “You see, Count Jester, there were these two strong girls. They beat up Jaelle then threatened me with a gun. We had no choice but to run away without getting any candy.”

Count Jester shrugs, “I don’t blame you. It’s getting dangerous these days. Can’t even steal candy from babies without someone threatening to shoot you.”

Angrily stomping on the floor Jaelle yells, “Want revenge!”

Count Jester laughs throwing back his cloak and holding out his hand, “Don’t worry. Soon my ultimate creation shall be finished. Then…” He closes his hand into a fist, “… The world, and all it’s candy, will be ours! Mwhahaha!”

Lightning flashes illuminating a wizard like shape with two yellow glowing eyes laying on a metal table.

To Be Continued…